so says the straw hat

hi. can i sit next to you in spanish class? sex. hi. i like your songs. sex? sex. hi. can i go on your motorcycle? sex. hi. can i go on your motorcycle? how is your girlfriend? sex. hi. im drunk. sex. me too. sex. hi. sex. hi. your kids are in bed, i am sorry about your wife cheating on you. sex? hi. nice clarinet. (sex) thanks. hi. sex. hi. I let another boy kiss me. I hate you. (sex?) ihi. internet. sex. hi. here is the assignment for class. sex. hi. sex. hi. sex. hi. funny joke. sex. hi. might as well sex. yeah. sex.

dear sir, your picture looks like a postcard. and remember to always make written agreements instead of verbal ones, or else the money never does work in your favor. dear sir, your postcard looks just like a picture. your eyelashes curl better than a handlebar mustache. in Texas, I have learned the meanings of "raining sheets" and "when the lightening cracked." I love a good southern storm.

I exfoliated with the floor. we made up names for sex moves that haven't been invented and slapped high five handprints onto places that looked clean. I spread the clay on my face like the way people say warpaint looks like. I used a trowel once. I want to use it again. I love the way dirt feels on my body. I love laughing with friends while getting things done. I love the warm air of the south--being hot in a romper at midnight--smelling of citronella and clay.

In correction to my earlier statement: Texas, in fact, has three federally recognized tribes/reservations. Washington State has twenty-nine. About 3 and 3/4 Washington States could fit into Texas. That means that the ratio would be Washington 108.75 to Texas 3. Also, I want to have a word with those hospitals and their shitty shitty shitty ER procedures. If I am ever in serious abdominal pain again and think I am going to die, I am going to think twice about going to the ER. And then I will probably die. And I am going to go ahead and blame privatized health care for that. Is that ignorant? Perhaps. I just now thought "I should sign up for Twitter, or remember my password, so that I can follow the Census and its tweets." Dork Alert.

Well, what do I have to say on this, the Fourth of July? Lets see. 1. Oklahoma is on the television. I am at the house where I nanny. They are out of town and I am to feed their cat and fish. I've been hanging out here because I like to be alone. Sometimes to my own detriment. For example, I do not have plans for tonight. I may just stay in. Is that sad? I don't know. It is sort of by choice. Here is what is happening on TV "The cows will moo in the clover, the river will ripple out a whispered song and whisper it over and over--don'tchuwishedyewdgo onforever--in that shiny little surrey with the fringe on top." Oh Chelsea...how I miss watching Oklahoma with you, back when we were kids. 2. I cannot hear any fireworks. 3. I did not run into any cockroaches when I was cooking, but last night, there were THREE in the kitchen at 3 in the morning. This makes me want to die. Also, outside today there was one just chilling by the step--which is just this rickety piece of...