Lists

creepy men that have recently hit on me:
1. the toy-joy boy
2. the bus driver
3. the homeless man by the movie theatre
4. fellow bus rider when the bus had broken down, also possibly homeless
(this does not reflect well on me)

creepy ways said creepy men hit on me(respectively)
1. "do you go to barton springs often? you have this very distinct earthy smell"
2. hands me a bus pass I did not pay for. It reads: Lunch? no (yes). when? where?
3. "god told me to come and tell you that you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen" (me: who? god? neverheardofhim)
4. him: May I? I'll walk with you. me: I am going to ride my bike.

reasons why today made me mad:
1. baby projectile vomiting
2. a two year old. just being two.
3. being a nanny for a family with a retired dad.
4. how i was 20 minutes early and the bus was 10 minutes late
5. The automated lady who is supposed to help me: "I'm sorry, I did not understand what you said. I'm sorry, I did not understand..." and "thank you for calling, goodbye."
6. how the bus driver didn't stop for the homeless men with their bags of cans.
7. white people huddled in what looked like prayer circles on the corner of 12th and chicon
8. this two-day migraine
9. the corner store clerk telling me i need to hurry up and have a baby before it is too late.
10. eating a carton of ice cream

reasons why today was beautiful:
1. when Finnian finally laughs
2. the big red flowers falling from the trees, scattered on the ground like porcelain teacups
3. the texan with the drawl: "we stopped getting the Times, we were just wasting trees"
4. free dinner
5. When I asked the lost dog if he wanted to come home with me, he stayed seated, rump to ground, tail wagging. When I asked lost dog where he lived, he perked up and started trotting down the street. He ran into Charley, his neighbor and looked back at me, waiting. I asked him again to show me where he lived. He happily kept on trotting to his fence and started barking up at it until his owner came around.
6. eating a carton of ice cream.

I know I am real because I can stand in front of this mirror. I can stand here. I can raise up my hand to my throat.

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